Teachers and school staff play an important role in creating environments where kids and teens with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) or chronic dysregulation can thrive. These children often navigate the world with heightened sensitivity to pressure and expectations, making traditional behavioral approaches ineffective—and often harmful.

By focusing on trust, autonomy, and relationship-building, we can better support PDA kids and help them feel safe and capable in educational and social settings. Here are 10 practical strategies to help build a more inclusive, supportive school environment:

1. Focus on Relationship-Building First

Trust is the foundation for positive outcomes. When kids feel connected to the adults in their lives, they’re more likely to engage, learn, and thrive. Assign positive intent to student actions whenever possible, and allow for a fresh start each day.

2. Don't Correct Kids in Front of Others

Corrections, especially in front of peers or staff, can feel deeply shaming for kids with PDA or chronic dysregulation. If a child needs guidance or redirection, do it privately. This helps preserve their dignity and avoids triggering defensive behaviors.

3. No Homework

After a long day of masking, complying, and navigating expectations at school, kids need time to unmask and relax at home. Homework often adds extra layers of pressure and takes away from critical downtime. Allowing this autonomy helps them recharge for the next day.

4. Give Advance Notice of Changes

Kids with PDA thrive on predictability. Changes to routines—like substitute teachers or schedule shifts—can feel overwhelming. Let kids and caregivers know about these changes in advance whenever possible, helping them prepare and adjust.

5. Autonomy in Offering Answers

Calling on kids to answer questions in a group setting can feel too vulnerable, triggering avoidance or anxiety. Instead, allow them to volunteer answers on their own terms. This small adjustment can foster participation without creating extra pressure.

6. Allow for Opting Out or Playing Spectator

Kids with PDA need the opportunity to sit out of activities or watch other people try things out first. Adults often underestimate the power of passive learning experiences like modeling, especially when active participation feels too hard or is inaccessible.

7. Choice in Work Order

PDA kids thrive when they have a sense of control over their day. Allow them to choose the order in which they complete tasks or assignments. This simple adjustment can reduce anxiety and increase engagement.

8. Give Space During Dysregulation

When a child is beginning to show even low levels of dysregulation, reduce verbal input and give them space. Talking or trying to reason in the moment can escalate the situation. Instead, back off and wait until they’re ready to re-engage.

9. Develop a “Help” Signal

Some kids may struggle to verbalize when they need help or a break. Establish a non-verbal signal they can use to communicate without feeling exposed or pressured. This can be a lifesaver in moments of stress (and it builds so much trust!)

10. Ditch the Behavioral Interventions

Traditional behavioral methods like reward charts, removing privileges, or seclusion are counterproductive and harmful for kids with sensitive threat responses. They often escalate distress rather than resolve it (and don't actually teach skills.) Break the mold of traditional education or behavioral plans and develop proactive and collaborative solutions.

By implementing these strategies, we can create environments that respect each child’s individuality and support their needs. Kids with PDA and chronic dysregulation aren’t trying to be difficult—they’re trying to feel safe. When we meet them with compassion, trust, and autonomy, we pave the way for growth, connection, and success.